1st movie alone....Happy birthday

I alway wanted to do it, but each time I never take the first step. Today, I finally did it, I watched the 1st movie by myself in a movie theatre. There were only 5 pairs of people in the theatre, very empty for a weekday- no wonder they want to increase movie price tix. I think the most busy time will be during weekend.


Happy Birthday
It looks almost as an oath, Mimi (Rene Liu) would receive an e-mail from Nam (Louis Koo) every birthday, a guy that she never forget. But the e-mail is delayed 42 hours this time.

Nam and Mimi once were lovers when they were University students. Mimi was afraid of losing Nam, therefore she suggested being “soul mate” with him instead. Eventually, they separated when Nam went abroad for studying. Nam has got many girlfriends but none of them could keep in good and long relationship, because his heart was stick on Mimi. Of course Mimi knew that and she couldn’t leave Nam alone too. But Mimi strongly believed that not to acquire each other is the only way to keep romantic relationship forever and ever.

One day, Nam told Mimi that he was getting married. From then on, Mimi would receive a birthday greeting from Nam every year. It was just like a clue to prove that love still exists between them. Only Mimi’s friend knew that the greetings were not sent by Nam…

Thoughts:
Before, I went to watch this movie, I have read the synposis and I know its going to be a very typical love story- Both love each other however, someone is going to die in the show to make this love story a romantic one. As expected , it turn out this way. Nevertheless, I cried and I look like a little mouse with a pink nose. Ke ke

It wasn't so bad watching movie alone, just like renting a DVD to watch at home but the theatre is a bigger TV with better sound and ambience.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME ALSO!~!~

Thanks for all the blessing I recieve during my birthday. Really happy that my friends remember my birthday. Feel abit down, as this is the first time I never get to eat cake on my birthday nor get to eat good food because of my operation. Bohhoo!~!~ Nevermind, I will wait.... ke ke

Recovery=Discovery

I thought maybe after talking through my mind, I don't have to blog this feeling but I guess... ever since I'm so use to blogging in here... I feel much more better after writing it out or else they keep HAUNTING me. wahahhaha Now I know why blogging is addictive...

1st discovery:
FEAR: that which causes a feeling of being afraid; that of which a person is afraid

That is what I feel like blogging... everyone fear for something but if the things is normal- what occur everyday would you fear? e.g if waking up is not a norm, will you fear to wake up? if eating through the mouth is not a norm will you fear to eat?

Before the operation, I remember fearing... before I went to australia alone... I remember fearing... These two moments of my life make me finally understand what is it that I'm looking for... like everyone I fear before trying and holding on to someone make this fear less visible. But when there is no one to hold on to you, you fear that you will drop down and die? I find that in fact thats not the case which one fear it will be, rather there is nothing in front that needs to be afraid. I fear that the moment I woke up from my operation, I fear to be alone feeling the pain, been miserable, there will be no one to comfort you, etc. So I gave myself a test, that is try to feel the people around me, be it the nurse, the doctor, etc they are people who care. And, surprisingly, I don't really feel pain nor miserable but rather happy. If you are afraid of injection, try shifting your fear of pain and surprisingly your body reacts to nothing.

Hmm..... what am i trying to talk about? actually after so long I also have no idea.. just some random thoughts that I feel like blogging... IGNORE IT... now this blog don't make any sense after re-reading... but since I have talk so much rubbish might as well don't delete it lah.

Back from the plastic factory!~!

Yes! I'm well and back from the hospital! Nothing major had change- was afraid that I have to operate alot of area... in the end she only did the lower jaw and a chin push out. ke ke and I was already alive and kicking the next day at the HD ward making all the nurse laughing.

17/01/07
I could not remember I was nervous, afraid or what... to be walking into the operation theatre by myself, sitting at the sofa waiting for my turn to walk onto the operating table. Can you imagine walking towards the table, climb onto the table myself? From the moment, I step into the operating theatre is like i'm out of my body, feeling nothing... super calm... talking joke with the doctors who attended to be... oh man, speaking about doctor, he poke me twice... first he can't find the stupid vein after poking the needle in and he has to pull out and find another spot and poke me again. You think not pain ah!!! I'm skinny mah, of coz my veins are fine!

That's all I can remember... the next moment I remember I was struggling as I woke up from my sleep ... and the next momemt I was been wheel around... and the next moment my mum came.. and the next moment I was alone lying in bed at the HD ward. Could not sleep the whole night, walking every 30min of so, thinking time has pass very fast... all I can do is lie there and pee, occassionally nurses come and disturb me checking my pressure, giving me injection. This went on from 7pm timm 6am the next day.

18/01/07
The next day I was well alert. Of coz, after sleeping for so long who won't be! I was already trying to talk (write) but I can't talk as my teeth are all tied up leaving only gaps for me to suck liquid. I was afraid before the operation as the surgeon say I will be miserable, swollen, etc but now I understand a happy person recovers faster. That's what happen, I don't seems to be affected by the operation, partially there is no pain... just discomforted. When I was wheel to the normal ward I was trying to move around. Actually, I can be discard on the next day but because I started to have allergy to all the antibiotic that they gave me giving me rashes all over my body that I have no choice to stay for another night.

Local hospital:
1. They are understaff.. why I say that because it took them bloody long to answer a buzz and sometime I felt they ignore it.

2. They also are less passionate about their job, they can't be bother whether the patients had taken their food before giving them medicine. I thought you should at least fill your stomach before taking any medicine or else your stomach can't take it. If young people like us can't, how can those sick old people? An old lady that stay opposite me went into ICU, I felt partially is the nurses fault. The old lady did not eat and they can't be bothered, keep feeding her medicine. The family members are worried sick. But of coz, I felt they are also a bunch of unfilial children as they can only complain, get fustracted with her not eating, etc. They don't even know how to carry her up or even bother to use just a bit of patient to trick her to eat, etc. All I know the old lady went into some complication throughout the night and the next morning, I heard she was in ICU.

3. Stupid nurse that insist that I draw up the curtain as she need to constantly come and check on my blood pressure. For god seek! Is pulling away a curtain so difficult? How can I possibly sleep with all the lights keep switching on and off?? Yes, I know this is a hospital but I think I desire to have my own private space right?

4. Nurses that can't speak the language. What is the possible of stating what language you are speaking when the nurses can only speak abit of that language. Most nurses are malays, althought they can understand and speak alittle of the dialet but I guess its quite limited to those hard to hear old people. I can't stand those Mainland china nurse... can't understand what they are talking about when they speak english.... was so scared they issue wrong medicine to the wrong person.

Okay enough of complaints of the hospital. Here is the picture of me after operation:

3rd day after the operation (back and home)

4th day after the opeartion

A tattoo... worth remembering....

I watched miami ink and have a desire to get a tattoo... a tattoo means alot of things... is not about just putting a picture on to your skin but rather each and every one of it has a meaning, a story behind each tattoo, a reason of wanting that tattoo on your. For me I wanted to remind myself- I am not meant to fly, as I shed my broken wings now, it shall never grow back... i'm a fallen angel

Don't it look good on me?

Am I'm asking too much for what I have bargain for....

11 days to my opearation day and my surgeon is yet to decide on how to do my case.... waited for 1hour before I get to see her. I really don't know what is the purpose of making appointment when one has to wait for so long for their consultation... and after waited for so long, only to waited even for another 15min as they did don't get the teeth mould that she left it in the lab... and not even that I only get to hear her talk like 10min and I'm off with my x-ray and ask to be back next week to get another two sets of mould for her to do her pre-surgery test again... ah!~! Its driving me crazy.... I did not know that my jaw bone has such a defact... its kind of shorter and angular and because of that she can't decide which is which.. to sacrifice my nose or what... ah!!~ will my nose gets bigger?? I don't want a bigger nose... all I want is to get rid of my ugly sharp chin and now I'm really doubt my decision for opting to do the surgery.... am I asking too much for what I have bargain for????